She who does embarrassing, charming things

I have Yesterday stuck in my head. Get out! Get out!

So...eventful weekend.

Maggie ate dinner with me and Tammy at Tammy's house on Friday. I like cooking for other people. It seems a waste if it's just for me, but for others I don't mind so much. We watched movies and had a little girls' night in. Fun!

I woke up Saturday morning to discover a notice on my door telling me that my one of my neighbors was attacked at about 2:00 that morning. Apparently, the guy hit her over the head with a bottle and intended to rape her but fled when another neighbor heard her screaming and turned on his porch light. Scary. I was coming home about that time. I must have just missed it. I can't imagine that I would have missed the screaming if I had been there.

The flier said "attempted assault." I hate to split hairs, but getting hit over the head with a bottle doesn't seem so much like attempted assault as...assault. But I guess that's just me.

Saturday was pretty laidback. I didn't even get out of my pajamas. I cleaned some, and I did some strengthening exercises, but mostly I read and watched TV, including England and Paraguay in the World Cup.

Sunday was fun. I was late for worship practice because I could not motivate myself to move faster. I think there's a time warp that oozes into my apartment on Sunday mornings that makes time speed up and me slow down, causing me to take three times as long to get ready to walk out the door as it takes on any other morning. Then again, I'm usually not walking out my door on most other mornings, so maybe that's the difference.

But anyway, we tried a couple of new songs (well, new to us anyway) Sunday morning, and they went pretty well. Since I'd not managed to make coffee before leaving the house, it was easy to get some sleep in the afternoon to prepare for the night shift. Good thing I did, or I would have had to sleep instead of going to Tammy and Michelle's for dinner. I not only like cooking for others, I like to be cooked for. Nice.

And now I'm here at the desk, and my arms are sore (I guess from the exercise - weird that I didn't notice the soreness until now). And I have a new icon that matches one of my coasters.

The end.

Dear Victoria's Secret Employee-in-Training,

I know you're new here. So let me explain something.

I visit your store at least once a month. I also work a desk job where I can spend a lot of time on the VS website. And you look about 18, which means that I've been a faithful customer of your company since you were in kindergarten. So I don't really need a lot of assistance from you.

What I do need is for you to listen to me when I smile, appreciative of the polite acknowledgment that you gave me when I walked in the door, and say, "No thanks - I'm just looking." Just step back, let me do my thing, and keep an eye out for when I do find something so that you can swoop in like a superhero and do that whisk-everything-I'm-holding-away-to-the-cash-register-so-that-I-don't-have-to-be-bothered-carrying-it thing that I love so much.

What I do NOT need is for you to help me find the style or size I want. I have so much VS underwear at home that I could probably go two months and never wear the same pair twice. I know the company and the product - I know what I like, and I know what fits. Do not - I repeat - DO NOT look me up and down, raise one eyebrow, and say, "Maybe we should try a different size."

Unless, of course, by "different size" you mean a smaller one. Because, although I will politely decline the suggestion and buy the size that I know actually fits, I must confess that, when I am in the mood to spend money, kissing my ass will get you everywhere. That small dose of flattery, empty as you and I know it to be, can really up your commission.

But right now, I wouldn't so much as buy lip gloss from you, thanks to your lackluster customer service. So here's hoping that you've learned your lesson. Maybe next month you'll do better.

love,
coffeesnob

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*sheepish look; shuffling feet*

I'm here. I have neglected the returning of phone calls, canceled dinner plans, and generally been a royal flake. This semester is kicking my ass.

As far as lj goes, I've been lurking sporadically, but I've not really had much to say. I did take a break from running around like a chicken with its head cut off to go to the arts and jazz festival this weekend, where I bought a really nifty hair ornament (ornament for the hair, not made of hair - just wanted to clarify), I stood in line for an eternity to wait for fried pickles, I listened to Brave Combo, and it was decided that I need to marry a man who dances. I can accept that.

My last Tuesday/Thursday class met yesterday. I know that I still have to meet for finals and finish grades, but the end-of-school euphoria (and subsequent impending slothdom) is already setting in. I have never been so ready for summer in my life.

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Yay House! As much as I love that show, I just don't have anything to say about it usually.

( Gilmore Girls, on the other hand... )

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Not quite sure how I feel about this...but ok.


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Um....that is all.